Gallery
CALMER
70x100cm oil on canvas
CALMER
70x100cm oil on canvas
This painting is my expression of gratitude for BTS, who inspired me to be open about my experiences and struggles with my mental health. They truly motivate me to create work that can positively impact people who might need it. Just as they do through music, I try to achieve that visually through my art.
I hope my work can contribute, even in a small way, to normalizing conversations about emotional well-being and to supporting others on their healing journeys.
It is often said,
“You don’t find BTS, BTS finds you."
I couldn’t agree more. My journey as an ARMY began 7 years ago. I discovered BTS when my mental state became really bad. Nothing made sense to me, and I lost all motivation to study. Every day, I fought the urge to stay in bed rather than go to school. There were days when I actually turned around midway and went back home. I spent most of my days under the blanket, either sleeping, watching dramas and YouTube videos, or discovering all kinds of BTS content. With each passing month, my condition got worse. At the time, I had no idea that I was dealing with depression.
At the end of 2020, I decided to seek professional help and start therapy (it was actually my second attempt. The first one wasn’t the greatest experience, and it took me more than 7 months to ask for help again). I got diagnosed and started taking pills. BTS’ music accompanied that time. In 2021, inspired by “Louder than Bombs” and “Black Swan,” I created my “Free Yourself” painting, and my journey with expressing myself through art began.
"Tell me your story. I want to hear your voice, and I want to hear your conviction. No matter who you are, where you’re from, your skin colour, gender identity: speak yourself.”
~ Kim Namjoon (RM) at the launch of Generation Unlimited, at the UN General Assembly
I mentioned that this painting is a pendant to “LOUDER,” which is reflected in their similar composition. The mentioned work was all about self-expression: not being afraid to create, perform, speak up, or feel, despite the fear of judgment or the pressure to explain yourself. “CALMER” is its continuation. There’s a reason I chose this title. It captures the feeling that comes after you finally allow yourself to speak.
LOUDER
70x100cm oil on canvas
LOUDER
70x100cm oil on canvas
I mentioned before that this painting was inspired by listening to "Like Animals." The actual idea for this work came after my recent experience creating my "Eldest Daughter" series.
I decided to explore the theme of "eldest daughter syndrome" based on pop culture examples, my friends' stories, and, of course, my own experiences.
Sharing these paintings and opening up about my story wasn't easy, and unfortunately, I ended up having a few unpleasant conversations. It was a tough lesson, but an important one. I realized that I need to decide what I want to share based on how I feel, not on what others want or don't want to hear.
That’s why I created this piece. Blending "Like Animals" and "Louder Than Bombs" inspired me to create this composition.
I wanted this painting to be all about expression!
Bolder brushstrokes, rich colors, and various emotions.
Creating, performing, speaking up, and feeling despite the fear of being judged or having to explain yourself.
I developed my visual language as a way to express emotions honestly, without shame. I want my art to speak when words aren’t enough. Through my work, I try to translate complex inner experiences into images that others might recognize in themselves. If someone encounters my art and feels even a brief sense of comfort or understanding, that means a lot to me. Creating this work is also an expression of gratitude for the strength I found during difficult moments and for the artists who inspired me to be open about those experiences. I hope my work can contribute, even in a small way, to normalizing conversations about emotional well-being and to supporting others on their healing journeys.
HEALING
80x120cm oil on canvas
HEALING
80x120cm oil on canvas
The one piece that changed my life in some sort of way. I consider it a start of my artistic journey, when I started fully express what I have in mind. I remember how scared I was to share it with the caption I wrote. Turned out there was no need for it. I found understanding, sympathy, empathy and support.
I created it at the beginning of my healing process. The painting was quickly sold to a collector in Barcelona. I was very grateful - but I also soon regretted it, because the piece was very close to my heart.
It’s funny to read it now, as the painting is really, reaaaally dark. But I have to admit, it was a start of my lighter, more colorful pieces. Now when I look at it, it’s like a bridge between my “Free Yourself” and “Healing” works.
Later, I began creating a larger version of “Free Yourself” for myself. Over time, I realized I didn’t want to make the same painting, so I stopped. And the canvas waited… for over a year.
Recently, I forced myself to face it again. I even kept it on my bed, so I would wake up next to it, waiting for inspiration. One morning, it finally came. I painted directly over the old version - I won’t lie, it was terrifying (but also exciting).
The whole process became a mix of pure fun, humming while painting, intertwined with constant breakdowns and doubts about whether I would ever finish it.
What I value most about this painting is how many interpretations it allows. Everyone sees their own personal experience in it. Some relate it to battling illness, others to grief. Some view the painting from bottom to top, others the opposite way. I’m so grateful that it received such a warm response. It truly melts my heart to see how many people liked this work.
LOST IN BREATHING
40x40cm oil on canvas
LOST IN BREATHING
40x40cm oil on canvas
I see the mistakes in this caption now, but the meaning still stands. This was one of those paintings where the words were just as important as the visual part - a way for me to express my struggles with panic attacks.
This painting depicts a man blended into a dark forest, employing layered imagery to convey an anxiety attack. The branches crossing his throat symbolise the feeling of tightness and shortness of breath that often accompanies panic.
He is exhaling smoke, which represents the urge to breathe out anxiety - to release what’s built up inside him. The smoke isn’t dramatic or violent; it’s a necessary act, a reminder of how much effort it takes just to breathe when anxiety hits.
The forest feels close and heavy, reflecting how overwhelming and inescapable the experience can feel. To emphasize this, there’s a small silhouette of a man in the center.
At first, I couldn’t believe it. It felt impossible that someone could remember a painting they had only passed once on their feed. But that disbelief slowly turned into pride. I had helped, quietly and indirectly, and earned enough trust for someone to share something so personal with me.
Ever since it’s my main goal. If I can make someone feel something, offer more than just pleasant visuals, that’s when I know I’ve truly succeeded.
To this day, I have a print of this painting glued to the wall behind my desk.
I can look at it anytime I want.
Anytime I need to calm down.
Anytime I need to breath
Oil on canvas, 70x70 cm
Eldest Daughter
The first painting of the series (tho there’s no particular order) is an evolution of my previous smaller work “Eldest Daughter”.
The painting’s centerpiece is a metal corset - an armor worn to protect the family. It is intertwined with dried roses, symbolizing the sacrifice of one’s own vitality for the sake of others. I once read: “born first, expected to put herself last”. These words spoke to me because I often feel guilty if I don’t do so. Dried flowers are also associated with the struggle of finding love, a consequence of being overly independent and emotionally guarded.
The arrow is a direct tribute to one of our most well-known eldest daughters - Katniss Everdeen. As a teenager, I was strongly impressed by how brave and strong she was. An arrow can also indicate romantic love. But can it break through the armor?
The cracks fracturing the metal corset remain as a crucial part of this composition. They represent my persistent sense of failure: the feeling of never quite fulfilling my duties of being the role model I was expected to be.
Oil on canvas, 70x70 cm
First Born Daughter
The second painting features a girl seen from behind. Multiple hands reach toward her center, slowly tearing apart her skin. This piece is a visual representation of the eldest daughter’s boundaries (or, more accurately, her lack of them)
These hands may seem invasive; however, the figure allows them to hold her. I wanted to capture the yearning to be the one who is taken care of. This idea is further emphasized by a cluster of forget-me-not flowers blooming along her spine. A need hidden deep within, close to her heart.
Oil on canvas, 40cm diameter
Photosynthesis in Bionantism
White orchids with solar-panel petals rise from a tangle of cables intertwined with stems. Against a dark background, the scene centers on the quiet fusion of organic growth and mechanical structure - a calm study of how nature and technology can share the same form and yield the same result: sunlight transformed into energy.
Oil on canvas, 40cm diameter
Eldest daughter
"Eldest Daughter" is a visual exploration of the personal burdens inherent in this role. As the first-born child and grandchild, I have long been shaped by the unspoken expectation to be a perpetual role model. The painting's centerpiece is a feminine metal corset—an armor worn to protect the family. It is intertwined with dried roses, symbolizing the sacrifice of one's own vitality for the sake of others. It’s also linked to the struggle of finding love, a consequence of being overindependent and emotionally guarded. The cracks fracturing the armor represent my persistent sense of failure: the feeling of never quite fulfilling my duties of being the role model I was expected to be.
Oil on canvas, 40cm diameter
The Perfect End
This painting reflects the hidden struggles behind beauty and the quiet strength that comes from overcoming them. A kneeling figure appears exhausted, as if having just finished a long journey. Above him, a flower blooms - the result of every sacrifice, every moment of pain and effort. It represents the beauty that can emerge from hardship.
From the flower, a small figure swims upward toward the sky, symbolizing release and the search for freedom beyond struggle. Above, a few doves circle gently, suggesting peace and the calm that follows perseverance.
“The Perfect End” explores how people often admire the final result without seeing the journey behind it - the pain, the persistence, the unseen battles that make beauty possible. It is about the balance between effort and reward, struggle and serenity, and how every ending carries the story of what came before.
Oil on canvas, 40cm diameter
Let it hurt
Being creative and vulnerable is a beautiful process, but it often comes with emotional weight - it can hurt. It’s a dance of contradictions: expression and exposure, beauty and pain, freedom and fragility. Vulnerability becomes both the source of inspiration and the cost of creation.
I wanted to reflect that contradiction - how vulnerability, chaos, and healing can coexist. The figure stands in a stream of calm light while being consumed by fire, symbolizing the emotional cost of expression. The second figure is drowning, slowly consumed by the water - symbolising how artists allow themselves to be lost in the process.
Inspired by the Polish song “Niech boli”, the painting is a visual dance between destruction and clarity, where art becomes both the wound and the cure.
Oil on canvas board, 30cm diameter
Wild Flower
"Life is not a photo but a drawing that takes shape little by little with sketches and erasures. Only in the end, when we look at it all together, do we realize that every stroke, even the most painful, has shaped our happiness." (La dama velata)
This quote perfectly reflects the process behind this piece. The final version emerged from experimenting with my earlier “Wild Flower” inspired painting. Indigo is an album in which RM reflects on his twenties, sharing his internal struggles and confronting his past self with the person he is today. This painting is a visual representation of that beautiful, challenging, and chaotic decade, expressed through the many shades of indigo.
Oil on canvas board, 30cm diameter
My Abyss
The first impression this painting gives is one of “drowning.” Yet beneath that sense of submersion lies something more profound - a quiet, resilient blooming in darkness. Like a flower that opens only in shadow, it emerges amidst struggle, fragile yet determined. This work captures that delicate tension between survival and growth, portraying the extraordinary beauty of thriving even when light feels out of reach.
Oil on canvas board, 30cm diameter
White Lie
This piece reflects on the nature of “white lies”—those seemingly harmless statements we tell to avoid hurting others. But how often do we hide our true feelings behind a smile, not out of consideration, but fear of being misunderstood or judged? “I’m okay” may seem like a small, trivial lie, yet it can conceal deeper shadows, emotions we’re reluctant to confront or reveal. The painting captures that tension between outward composure and inner struggle, exploring the hidden darkness behind what we call harmless truths.
Oil on canvas board, 30cm diameter
I’ll burn
No matter how many tears you'll make me shed
You won't extinguish my flames
I'll burn
This piece is a celebration of holding onto your fire - your passions, joys, and the things that make your spirit light up. Whatever sparks happiness for you doesn’t need to make sense to anyone else; it’s yours, and that makes it beautiful. Every day, there are forces - sometimes strangers, sometimes loved ones, sometimes even ourselves - ready to dampen that flame. This painting is a reminder that it’s our responsibility to protect our fire, to keep it burning bright, and to let it warm and inspire us with each new day.
Oil on canvas board, 30cm diameter
Snooze
This composition is built around three symbolic elements: wings, reminding us to never stop dreaming; amaryllis flowers, representing hard-won success, especially in artistic pursuits; and Yoongi being carried off the stage, a gentle reminder of the importance of rest. Together, they form a narrative of aspiration, achievement, and self-care.
Oil on canvas board, 30cm diameter
Singularity
Inspired by “Singularity”, the song about hiding your true self. Wearing a mask to get over the pain.
However, the mask could change personality and make us lose our real identity. Is it worth hiding behind it?
Oil on canvas board, 30cm diameter
Shot Glass of Tears
Inspired by JK’s lyrics, this piece combines two glasses with a crystal flower- shimmering like diamonds, beautiful and strong, yet inherently fragile. It reflects our own souls, minds, and dreams: delicate, easily shattered by a single misstep. The work invites a quiet, vulnerable question we all face:
Am I ever going to heal again?
Oil on canvas board, 30cm diameter
Stop the Rain
This painting is my visual interpretation of “Stop the Rain” by Tablo and RM.
“When I was a kid I was convinced that I was destined for the 27 Club… I’m twenty-nine, sinkin’ in the bathtub, sippin’ gin…” (~RM)
When I heard those lines, I flashed back — I thought I was destined for the 19 Club. I was sinkin’ in the bathtub, ended up 24, sippin’ soju, still searching for meaning. My 20s felt like drifting through fog — heavy, slow, and uncertain. Everyone else seemed to be moving forward while I was just trying to breathe.
There’s guilt in not having a plan, in standing still. But maybe that’s part of being human — carrying pain you never asked for while trying to figure out how to keep going.
This song didn’t give me answers, but it gave me understanding — the quiet ache of still being here. And somehow, in that emptiness, it gave me enough to create again.
“Can’t run away from the pain, I’m tryna stop the forever rain.”
You stop running from the storm. You let it fall.
Oil on canvas, 40cm diameter
Desperate
MY EYES ARE BLEEDING
When parents don’t know if they’ll see their kid after school day. When People starve, loose their homes, leave their country, pray to survive the next day. When children are being deprived from their childhood. When people are being censored and losing freedom. When increasing polarization is slowly destroying our world.
“How many people suffer because of other people? How many lifes are destroyed because of war? How many families are separated? How many woman die because of visible hair under hijab? How many wifes or husbands are being abused? How many kids are traumatised? How many woman die because of refused abortion? How many people die because they love someone and others don’t accept it? How many people suffer because of one man’s ideology.... “
Questions I wrote 3 years ago… and the numbers in the answers are still increasing. Moreover, new questions appear every day. New reasons to keep us apart from each other.
“My eyes bleed everytime I read about these types of events... My eyes bleed desperately trying to look for peace... My heart bleed trying to keep my faith in humanity...
Will we ever stop?”
Movies like “Superman” are trying to restore our faith in people. But each day, news remind me that these movies… are still fiction…
Oil on canvas, 50x50cm
Philophobia
“Philophobia” explores the complex emotions tied to the fear of love.
At the center is a figure surrounded by red roses - symbols of love - yet also covered in thorns, representing how love often brings pain.
The girl’s back bears reddish-brown marks, symbolizing past negative experiences, while blue stains represent her fear of being hurt again. Scratches on her shoulder hint at self-punishment for her trust issues and emotional avoidance. To the left, a hand reaches out to offer help, but she turns away. The male hand is covered in blue thorns, reflecting her prejudices, past trauma, and anxiety, which she projects onto others.
”Philophobia” is a struggle between craving connection and pushing it away, and I hope I was able to capture that inner conflict.
Oil on canvas, 40x40cm each
Bloom: 4 seasons
The flowers in my paintings are more than just a beautiful addition to the portrait - they are silent storytellers. Each bloom is chosen with intention, layered with symbolism that adds emotional depth and narrative to the work. They whisper of themes like resilience, memory, love, or loss, offering a second language through color and form. While their outward beauty catches the eye, their true purpose is to echo the hidden layers of the subject’s identity and experience. In this way, the flowers become both an aesthetic element and a vessel for meaning, enriching the portrait beyond what words alone could express.
Oil on canvas, 40x30cm
Seraph
“And as you lay down your grace to me
The skies begin to bleach red
And the stars begin to fall
I feel myself changing
As my world starts dividing I’m going (I’m going, I’m going)
I look upon you one last time
As I
Set my wings on fire(...)”
(“Seraph” DPR IAN)
Oil on canvas, 50x50cm
Misunderstood
Scarlet red dominates this piece - a color of intensity and vulnerability, often misunderstood, much like the subject it represents. It’s balanced by verdigris: that elusive tone “not quite green, not quite blue,” a hue that resists definition. Around these colors, smoke drifts in shifting gradients, carrying the weight of unspoken emotion and internal conflict.
Created during the artist’s ADHD diagnosis, “Misunderstood” reflects on the dual nature of self-expression - where creativity becomes both freedom and confinement. The closed wings at the painting’s center embody this tension: the desire to soar restrained by the structures of identity, expectation, and perception.
Drawing inspiration from DPR IAN’s “Skins” and its haunting refrain, “I’ve never asked to be like this,” the work meditates on difference, sensitivity, and the struggle to exist authentically within systems not built for everyone.
Misunderstood invites viewers to consider the contradictions within themselves - the traits that liberate and limit.